June 8 - PR Run!

Total time: 45 minutes
Total distance: 3.75 miles

I set out to meet my PR today, or, if I couldn't do that (since I've been working my way back up lately) then to do at least 30 minutes to rebuild some of my time. I made a new playlist and dug out my old iPod shuffle so I could wear regular headphones. I put band-aids on all my blisters and almost-blisters. I didn't put on my new shoes because it had been rainy and gross all day and I didn't want to junk them up just yet. (Soon!) I even tried one of the Vega pre-workout drink packets from the Bloggers in Sin City swag bags - whether it helped or not, I don't know, but it at least put me in the right frame of mind.

While my iPod was charging, I waited for the rain to stop or at least let up a bit, but at this point, I was pretty much going to go anyway. I took some garbage out to gauge how hard it was raining (and if it would even be noticeable), and since I had a jacket and a hat on, I barely noticed it for the most part. Since a large part of where I run is heavily treed, I figured I'd be pretty protected anyway.

Once I started running, I could tell that it was one of those days where it probably could have gone either way. But I had already made up my mind that I was going to have a respectable run, so I told myself I might as well just make my peace with it and settle in for the long haul. Easier said than done, of course. I whisper-yelled at some point for my legs to shut up, because they were fine. (I'm not a crazy person, at all.)

I bargained with myself the whole way. My brain begged my body to go at least 25 because that would get us 2 miles. I kept chastising myself because if I couldn't do this, then how was I ever going to be able to run a 5k? Except that I knew I could, because I HAD. Only once, but that was enough to prove that I could.

I trudged along, willing my legs to keep moving and taking deep breaths and reminding myself that it was all a mental game. So they say. I reached my 30 minute mark and congratulated myself on at least hitting that goal. From that point forward, I would simply see how far I could go. Each minute I added felt like a minor victory.

When I hit 39 minutes, I told myself I only needed two more - one to tie my PR and one to break it. 41 minutes came and I didn't let myself quit. I didn't know how much longer I would go, but however long it was, was going to be a record. Around minute 43, it started raining pretty hard, making it all the more dramatic. The rain didn't really affect my running, it just made me wet and vaguely concerned about my various devices. I kind of caught myself flailing like a muppet and decided that that was probably a strong indicator that I was done. At first I thought I had gone 46 minutes because there were raindrops obscuring the display on my watch, but turns out it was "only" 45. Which worked out pretty well because I apparently like my five minute marks.

I was pretty proud of myself when I was done, obviously. I was surprised to see that my average pace was still consistent with my shorter runs, because I definitely felt like I had slowed down considerably by the 30 minute mark.  Everything past that was fueled on sheer willpower and, okay, pride. I like being able to post about doing well. It kind of keeps me accountable - if I wuss out after ten or fifteen minutes, everyone will know. 

I was joking to myself as I finished up my last few minutes that maybe I had died back in Minute 34 and my ghost kept on running, ala Professor Binns in Harry Potter. The last bit was definitely a struggle, and this sort of distance is definitely not something I can do consistently yet. I am signed up for a race on the 29th, and I'm hoping by then to have gotten a couple more long runs in so that when the time comes, I'm not worrying about whether it's a 20 Minute Day or a 40 Minute Day, and I can just start moving my feet and do it. Because every day is NOT a 40 minute day - not even a 30 minute day. But I've still got plenty of time to build up to it.